The "The Third Time's The Charm, Hopefully" Story

It was an ordinary day.  Sitting in the office of my neurospine surgeon talking with his assistant.  She is explaining to me all the things that can happen to me if and when I decide to have back surgery for the third time.  But, before all this happened, I shall tell you what happened 15 minutes ago.  Carol and I were sitting in the doctor's office when a slight knock was heard and a very thin woman opened the door and stepped into the office.  She walked over to us and introduced herself and than sat in a chair across from the two of us, next to her computer.  As she turned towards us she looked at my wife's shoes and said to her, "Oh, I like your shoes.  They are very similar to mine."  And they were, since they both were flats and had metal buckles on the front of them.  "Where did you get them?" she continued.  Carol replied, "At Kohls in Park City."  "I got mine at Nordstrom's in New York and they were expensive," she continued.  Carol said, "I paid about $30 for these and they are so comfortable.  They look exactly like yours."  Then she looked at me and said, "Now we must talk about you."  Found out that I'm in need of some minor repairs to my backbone to the tune of 3 to 4 hours worth.  She told me I could expect a recovery time of about the same amount of months and showed me on her computer what the mylogram I recently had done had revealed.  

Certainly not good news, but with the pain I have in my back and leg I kind of suspected what the results would be.  She explained exactly what the doctor would do to L-4 and L-5 vertebrae and what he would do to L-2.  Pins, screws, bone marrow from a cadaver and some picking and cutting of stuff to free my nerves and alleviate the pain.  I asked if I could get a card so I can go through security at the airport without being accosted and she assured me they would give me one.  Now, I know many people cringe at the thought of surgery, but I feel that with an experienced doctor (mine is one of the 100 best in the USA according to a medical journal) I will be able to spend another 10 years in my house, climbing the ladder to paint and mowing and weeding the lawn.  I'm not one who can sit and watch TV or read all day so I'm willing to take the chances associated with surgery so I can gain my quality of life back again.  I'll keep you informed in case you fall into the same situation as I am in.  It was another extraordinary day in the life of an ordinary guy.    

PS - I assume that by now the assistant has a new pair of shoes at a much cheaper price.