The "Woman Without Underpants" Story

It was an ordinary day.  Recouping from vacation.  Just got in about 3:00 AM after traveling back from St. Martin to Miami to Baltimore.  After picking our luggage up at the carousel at BWI we phoned Comfort Suites and they picked us up at the airport and dropped us at our car in their parking lot.  Then the long ride home from the airport to our house in Lancaster.  Wouldn't have been as bad had the rain stopped pelting the car relentlessly most of the way home.  But, we survived and hit the hay as soon as we got in the door.  Pretty stressed out.  Today we had a few chores that had to be done.  I visited my family doctor to check on my shingles and make sure that they weren't infected.  After we talked for a few minutes he said, "Well, let's take a look at what you got."  As I was removing my jeans he continued to talk, "There are basically three degrees of shingles.  The kind where you may have just a few blisters and very little pain, the kind where you have a moderate rash with reasonable pain, and."  It was at this point that he looked at my butt and leg as he finished his sentence. "what I'm looking at right now!  Oh, my!  You do have a case of the shingles."  We discussed what I can do to help myself such as take warm baths in a whirlpool bathtub if possible, rub Neosporin on the areas behind my knee to help the blisters heal faster, and take pain medication when needed.  He told me it may take up to a year before the results of what he is looking at go away.  But, then I may never get total relief from the virus that infected the lower left limb of my body.  Hey, that's enough of depressing news to pass along, so here is what Carol and I did after I got home from the docs.  We went to Costco!  But, just not any visit to Costco.  Here's some quick background info you will need.  After returning from Baltimore Airport early this morning, we dropped everything in our family room and headed to bed.  Carol pulled down her shorts and underpants together and placed them on a hook in her closet before putting her nightgown on for the evening.  Now, you have a picture of that?  Today, after I came home from the doctors and asked if she wanted to pick up a few things at Costco, she ran upstairs and got dressed.  Then ....... while walking around Costco, she felt something slide down her side under her shorts and drop on the floor by her feet.  Her UNDERPANTS!  Not the new pair she had just put on, but the pair that were inside the shorts she had removed early this morning before we hopped in bed.  Can you imagine her embarrassment when, after looking down and seeing them, and then looking around her and seeing everyone looking at her with a pair of underpants at the bottom of her legs.  What to do?  She just picked them up, rolled them into a ball and stuck them in her pocketbook.  Needless to say, I had walked away.  "What must those people have been thinking," she said to me when I returned.  "Probably that you were still on vacation and didn't need them.  No one wears underwear on vacation, remember," I told her. "At least it wasn't me for once who did something stupid."  It was another extraordinary day in the life of an ordinary guy.