The "Passing Time With A Good Laugh" Story

It was an ordinary day.  Another day filled with TV and news stories about COVID and getting, or not getting, vaccinations. Seems like it's been years since my wife, Carol, and I have been able to do anything other than sit in our recliners and hold our cat known as The Gray Lady.  The virus is still around the corner and we chose to stay out of it's way the best we can and that usually means staying home where we feel safe.  Mind you...we don't usually complain, but it does gets a bit boring day after day after day.  Luckily, my wife usually is the one who holds the cat, but when she is out walking around the neighborhood for exercise, I end up sitting in the lounge chair holding The Gray Lady.  After what seems like perhaps 15 minutes, Carol returns once again to see me sitting in the lounge chair, holding our sweetheart, The Gray Lady.  Carol usually looks exhausted and when she tells me she's been gone for almost an hour, I then realize I must have dozed off for....a few minutes!  We have been trying to pass time by doing different things around the house, but after a while we tend to get bored.  So...we talked about what we could do that is different and have come up with a few things to keep us busy.  One unusual thing we have come up with has to do with our TV.  On our television screen, when the house phone rings, it shows who is calling on the top right corner of the TV.  Many times it will tell us it is SPAM which means we do not answer it.  Well, we decided that we need some more entertainment, so now when the TV tells us it is SPAM we get off the recliner, pick up the phone and begin with unusual answers for the caller.  My latest response is..."Hang on a minute"...then I come back on the phone 30 seconds later and tell them..... "we see you are calling about SPAM and I just checked in the pantry and we have two big cans and one small can of SPAM so we don't really need any right now.  Try a few months from now and maybe we will need some more...and I immediately hang up the phone!"  I'm sure they are caught off guard, but the longer I make them wait before I begin to talk again, the less time they have to try and reach a few more places...maybe your home, to try and sell their stuff to you.  It was another extraordinary day in the life of an ordinary guy.