1. I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.
2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.
3. I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.
4. There is a great need for a sarcasm "font".
5. How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?
6. Was learning cursive really necessary?
7. Map Quest really needs to start their directions on #5. I'm pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.
8. Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.
9. I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.
10. Bad decisions make good stories.
11. I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of my word processing program and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my long document that I swear I didn't make any changes to.
12. I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.
13. I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.
14. How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear or understand a word they said?
15. I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars team up to prevent a jerk from cutting in at the front.
16. Shirts get dirty. Underwear get dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty, and you can wear them forever.
17. Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys, finding their cell phone, and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey - but I'd bet everyone can find and push the snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time, every time!
18. The first testicular guard, the "Cup", was used in hockey in 1874 and the first helmet was used in hockey in 1974. That means it only took 100 years for men to realize that their brain is also important!
What do you think? See yourself in quite a few of the statements. I'm sure you could add a few to the list if you try hard enough. It was another extraordinary day in the life of an ordinary guy.
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